What’s Your Passion?

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Do you believe this?  I recently had a conversation with a colleague about relationships, work, and above all else having a passion that guides you in life.  It was a difficult conversation for me to take part in, because honestly, I had never thought about what my own passion in life might be.  To her, it seemed that unless you had something that you couldn’t get enough of, something you couldn’t stop learning about, something that would never stop making you grow as a person, what were you doing with your life?  Maybe that passion is your career, or maybe it’s what you do in your leisure time, but everyone has a passion (so she believes).

My contribution to that conversation was, “What if you don’t?”  Then I started thinking about what my passion could be. She made it sound like your passion was your world. So I thought: Is it teaching?  probably not.  Is it creating objects whether it be quilts, scarves, paintings…? I do love that.  But crafting doesn’t qualify as a passion, does it?  Is it my family and friends?  I absolutely love spending time with them and talking with them, but are people a passion?  I like traveling! Although, I’ve seen people way more passionate about traveling than myself.  At the end of this conversation I felt rather inferior for being a passionless bore.

Then I remembered, I really like my life.  I like blogging when I feel like it, I like being able to travel when we can, I like shopping with friends, I like going on pinterest for hours, I like lounging with my hubby and watching tv…Maybe I don’t have a fervor for any one thing that consumes me, but eh, I don’t mind.  She might say that I’m wasting my life away, but I am enjoying every minute of it.

So my question to you: Do you think having a passion is essential to getting the most out of life?  If so, what’s your passion?

I’m Afraid of Children

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Okay, not all children, but the children in the 4th and 5th grade at the school I work at, in the lunch room, being crazy.  I’m afraid of them.  I am usually a pretty badass teacher who can handle most behavior problems.  Kids need structure, I say, and I give it to them.  But at this school where no child is made to ever have a consequence for his or her unwanted behavior, well, I’m clueless.  I think I’ve crippled myself by overthinking things, and now the students see the fear in my eyes at the beginning of every lunch time.  Today they decided to all break out into song and make the lunchroom a torture chamber for my ears.  (I tried to make them stop, but they just started back up again 1 minute later).  They were singing the “Sideburns” song.  I have included it below, but if you have half a brain, you will absolutely hate it.  I couldn’t even watch the whole thing.  God, I despise 4th and 5th graders.

 

Now a few of them have taken to rolling their eyes when I ask them to do something like, “listen up” or “clean up.”  Today, one kid even started mocking my word choices to his neighbor.  Granted, I made pretty terrible word choices because I was sweating like a pig with fear that no one was going to follow my directions.   Basically, this 25 minutes of my day is the absolute worst.  I’m pretty sure that the 1 1/2 hours a week I spend doing this shortens my life span by at least a month.  Apparently last year, they had two people helping with student supervision, but this year it’s just me.  I’m not sure if I should talk to my boss about it again or just suffer through the next 100 days in silence.

I’m very intuitive and I have the sense that each child in that room has this very thought when they see me:

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