You Are What You Eat: 9 Reasons Why My Waistline Hates Me

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I have always been one of those people that everyone is annoyed by.  You know, the person who never has to work out, yet never looks pudgy.  I could eat whatever I wanted and be a couch potato and still fit into my size 0 dresses.  (Don’t hate)

Then I decided to go on my first diet EVER.  Why? you might be asking.  Well, because my acupuncturist thought it might improve my fertility by lessening inflammation and making my womb a happy place for a baby to camp out.  So I went full force into this Paleo type diet and committed myself to it for 4 whole months.  It was rough, but potentially worth it.  I even lost weight (not an intention at all)!

A month before our move to Seattle, I quit the diet as a rebellion to our second failed IVF.  Since then, I have been spiraling out of control.  I didn’t think I was doing that badly, until a week ago I noticed my belly was distended.  “Whoa, I must be having a bad reaction to lactose!” And then it didn’t go away.  And then I stepped on a scale and my eyes nearly bugged out of my head at a number I had NEVER seen before.

I generally don’t care about the number on the scale, as long as you feel comfortable in your own skin, what’s a number anyway?  But right now I’m not feeling comfortable in my own skin.  I’m feeling swollen, uncomfortable, and frankly, gross.  I’m actually confused as to how I have put on 10 pounds in 6 weeks.  I don’t THINK I’m eating that differently than I did before the diet. Do diets mess up your metabolism so that when you go off of them your body reacts by storing fat?  (I am gonna believe that totally made up theory to comfort myself.  “It’s not my fault.  My body’s metabolism is all funky right now.”)

But if I’m being totally honest with myself, this pickle I’m in is due to me having way too much fun here in Seattle.  The top 9 reasons are pictured above.

1. Poutine (OH, God, Poutine!)

2.  Beecher’s Mac and Cheese

3.  Baked Beans and Toast (Brunch at Tilikum Place Cafe)

4. Smore’s (Dessert at Local 360)

5. Beer (Happy Hour Everywhere here!)

6. Ice Cream (I now have a sweet tooth)

7. More Brunch (Pettirosso)

8. Chocolate Popcorn (need I say more?)

9. Nachos (at Cactus)

Should I go back on a diet? Should I embrace the new rolls on my belly? What’s a girl to do?

*The positive to this story is that my neighbors ask me for food recommendations, and I’ve been here less time than they.  (Is this really good news?)


3 thoughts on “You Are What You Eat: 9 Reasons Why My Waistline Hates Me

  1. Once again I agree with Jules Gut. I think I’m your guys’ third but lost sister. 😉 I love that you’re eating all this amazing stuff. Keep Zumba-ing, that should help you feel aight! (Like that gangsta verbage?)

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